Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Crocodile Anybody?
Anybody, especially my fellow mates from Secondary School would possess knowledge of the fact that I am a faithful patron to Crocodile Brand Briefs. However, because I am longer in Secondary School, and am currently in Junior College, I would like to introduce to all why they remain my #1 choice despite all these years.
Firstly, a ride back to good old days, when Ivan was in the care of his dear grandparents. That was before I was 7 years old. Ivan was never a great fan of underwears to start with, and naturally being his grandparents' choice of favouritism, they relented and allowed him to only wear underwears when he went to school. Now note when I say go to school. I seriously only wore them when I went to school, not when I went out. Talk about irony here. Talk to me.
Secondly, he learnt to "like" wearing underwears because when he was about 7 years old, just when he was about to go back to his real home, he accidentally got too excited about wearing jeans and in his hurry zipped his little tool in the process. It was an antagonising big league, but nevertheless memorable. Now everybody say 'awwwww so poor thing' with me. Thank you very much, much appreciated. I am most gratified.
Thirdly, Ivan forgets occasionally, when he was a little kid, to wear underwear even to school. He would only realise it when he felt extremely happy and comforted. So now you know why Ivan has so many wrinkles and frowns consistently.
Fourthly (is there such a word?), actually Ivan doesn't really enjoy wearing crocodile underwears. He just has no choice because all his underwears are bought by his mother, except for an exceptional few pieces he owns, such as the 3 Thongs and several Sport Pouches. Although I own several kinky pieces of underwear, I only wear them by special request (not like those in MacDonald's) or when I feel sofaking kinky. Of course such occurances happen sporadically.
The funny thing about wearing a Sport Pouch is that sometimes my you-know-what falls out when I sit down. I mean DOUBLE-YOU-TEE-EFF man, u know W-T-F? And they call it a Sport Pouch. Just like how people who tan all day in Sentosa call themselves Beach Bois, yeah the Bois, with the I.
Speaking of such, its once agian, a constant paradox to say that everybody should wear sexy underwear to arouse their partner. I mean yeah, it really is no doubt, but more than often, its the girls who pay attention to such stuff rather than guys. I mean seriously, sexy underwear turns me on like a bloody motorcar with 60000000000000000 horsepower. Seriously.
Just look at these:
This is for all you girls, okieeeeeeeee. So don't say I practice sexual discrimination and all that booooohaaaaa. Nevertheless, I'm still going to say that WOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH THONGS/G-STRINGS DOES THE TRICK MAAAAAAAN!
You have no idea how the kinkiest things happen to me. I was just trying to find an image of a sport pouch I possess, but apparently I typed in Thongs and got side-tracked by those images instead. How not to side-track when Ivan loves women with sexy underwear, you tell me.
posted@11:01 PM